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photo of the week by Anita Berghoef

Three links about relationships – with friends and family, God, and your significant other (-to-be). A book list. And another good reason to do your own cooking.

:: How Not to Say the Wrong Thing (Los Angeles Times)

Susan has since developed a simple technique to help people avoid this mistake. It works for all kinds of crises: medical, legal, financial, romantic, even existential. She calls it the Ring Theory.

Draw a circle. This is the center ring. In it, put the name of the person at the center of the current trauma. For Katie’s aneurysm, that’s Katie. Now draw a larger circle around the first one. In that ring put the name of the person next closest to the trauma. In the case of Katie’s aneurysm, that was Katie’s husband, Pat. Repeat the process as many times as you need to. In each larger ring put the next closest people. Parents and children before more distant relatives. Intimate friends in smaller rings, less intimate friends in larger ones. When you are done you have a Kvetching Order. One of Susan’s patients found it useful to tape it to her refrigerator.

Here are the rules. The person in the center ring can say anything she wants to anyone, anywhere. She can kvetch and complain and whine and moan and curse the heavens and say, “Life is unfair” and “Why me?” That’s the one payoff for being in the center ring.

Everyone else can say those things too, but only to people in larger rings.

:: I Didn’t Do Anything (Simcha Fisher)

I hadn’t been doing anything, and this is where it landed me.  Sick, hurt, angry, half paralyzed, and looking around for someone else to blame.

Most Catholics will agree that praying does all sorts of wonderful things for us.  But have you ever thought about what happens to us when we don’t pray?  We don’t just maintain some sort of neutral spiritual state until we begin praying again, believe me.  A little neglect leads to a little degeneration, and the next thing you know, you’re a whimpering heap on the table, wishing and hoping for the knife to come and put you out of your misery.  Even though you didn’t do anything.

:: Is Pornography Cheating? (JackieandBobby.com)


Oh, sorry…I guess I need to write more. Well, I guess I can explain it a little better.

Girls can usually see this issue for what it is. We guys, on the other hand, rationalize, make excuses, or are just simply too addicted to our lust to admit what is staring at us from the computer screen.

Pornography is cheating on your family, cheating on your spouse, and ultimately cheating on yourself.

I really believe that pornography is the “silent killer” of our generation, stripping men (and a growing population of women) of their vitality and potency to become the men they’re called to be.

:: 7 Books I Read Over and Over Again (Modern Mrs Darcy)

I’ll re-read a book for one of two reasons: because I love it, or because I need it. This list features a healthy mix of both.

:: The Sugar Hiding in Everyday Foods (via Mark Bittman)

We’ve written about the dangers of sugar many times, and we know that sodas are chock full of it. But what about everyday foods? Today we bring you an excellent video by Buzzfeed revealing the astonishing amount of sugar in foods we don’t associate with being necessarily sugary. What do you think has more sugar: baked beans or Monster Energy Drink? You’d be surprised.